adminEven though we’re stuck at home (mostly) I know you still have a lot to express.
Whether it’s your passionate perspective about a work topic or a heated conversation with your partner, are you censoring yourself?
Are you hiding?
There are lots of reasons why you might keep your message, voice and presence to yourself. Bottomline, it seems safer to clam up, people-please and wait for the next opportunity (and then the next, and the next).
But if you’re on this list, I know you are so done with that old pattern!
I know you aren’t willing to settle for just getting through these moments anymore.
It’s time to thrive and be fully expressed, right?
I want you to walk away from an important meeting, a big interview or a charged conversation knowing that you had given it your all.
All you need is one mindset shift to get there. That’s what this week’s blog is about.
What thoughts would help you to be fully expressed?
You have enough of the other thoughts that keep you from expressing confidently. They can be really strong. But, there is really only one core thought that you need to cultivate to turn the tables.
Making Mindset Shifts
Have ever cultivated a new mindset on purpose?
It can be an amorphous thing to do that leaves you wondering if anything has actually changed and if it was worth the effort, sometimes.
But, when you know how to consciously cultivate a new mindset and stick with it until you see external changes you’ll know that this process is some of the most powerful stuff out there.
This practice is for those of you who have noticed persistent negative thoughts about yourself for a long time. We all have some self-defeating thoughts sometimes, but the question is do your negative thoughts stop you from moving forward positively.
Maybe you’ve noticed thoughts like, “I’d rather just stay quiet during this meeting”, “I’ll just let him say what he wants to say and agree with him because I don’t want to create an argument”, “I really don’t know what to say so I’ll just say what I think they want to hear.”
Sound familiar at all?
Cultivate A New Thought
To cultivate a new thought you need to have that new thought regularly. It’s like we are a forging a new trail in the forest of your mind.
Some call this an “affirmation” practice. But I find affirmations can go in one ear and out the other.
Let’s go a little bit further beyond affirmations to finding evidence of the new belief so that you can actually start to see that it’s true.
The way to do this is to state the belief you want to build and then find reasons why? it’s true right now. Like this:
I’m a confident speaker because…
- I have done a lot of speaking gigs already
- I always get positive feedback
- People are smiling when they are listening to me
Etc… Come up with at least 5 reasons why and do this exercise regularly to see changes.
The One Key Mindset Shift
Ok, back to the specific mindset shift that this blog is about. What thought will support you to release self-criticism and cultivate true, authentic confidence?
Here it is! What if you naturally had this thought floating through your mind?
“I am willing to be seen and heard.”
Say that out loud to yourself once and see how it feels.
Are you willing to be seen and heard?
Are you willing right now to be seen as yourself? Are you willing to be heard in your authentic voice?
The most common thing I hear when people first come to me is that they are shrinking down, playing small and getting tight like a turtle when the spotlight turns to them.
They are expressing a completely different mindset than the one above. A common mindset would be something like,”I hope I get through this”, or “I’ll just try harder so that I can get this right.”
But, what if your mindset was simply, I’m willing to be seen and heard? No resistance. No proving. Just willingness.
Feels different, right?
Try it on. Put a post-it by your computer. Put a reminder on your phone. And, do the exercise to build this new belief.
I am willing to be seen and heard because… (find at least 5 reasons).
I hope this helps you to transform your inner confidence and cultivate rock-solid confidence and authenticity. Let me know what you got from this article below in the comments!
